10:20 am  •  1 May 2012  •  View comments

Before I turn 20 years old, there are various things I want to tell my younger self first. Reminiscing memories, praises for having a good job and reminders I should have heard earlier.

To the 2 years old me, the reason why you are entering school this early is because you don’t have a “yaya”. Your parents are busy working for you. So, even if you studied this early, please do not lose interest in going to school in the future. In addition to that, why did you have to be so madaldal and have embarrassing stories? tsk..tsk..

To the 6 years old me, you are now grade 1 and it is just sad that in this early age you experience painful bullying from your fellow student. Learn not to be shy and be brave to speak up for yourself. Because in the future, you will experience much more than what you are experiencing right now.

To the 7 years old me, you will be transferring to a new school. A public school unlike your previous school. Accept it and do not cut your classes. Don’t stop dreaming of becoming a doctor, teacher or a nurse.

To the 10 years old me, going back to your old school and getting your glasses on wouldn’t be so easy. As I said, be brave to speak up for yourself. Furthermore, I assure you, you will not look gawky in the future as you are right now. I am sure that no one will ever do mean things to you anymore in the future.

To the 12 & 13 years old me, you are now high school. Participate and be active in all the activities in school. Make the most out of your high school life and make this as one of the happiest part of your life. And also, leave the introvert personality behind and make more friends. Now that you have discovered your talent, practice it and bring it to life. Strive and make more effort in achieving it. Do not entertain unnecessary people in your life as much as possible.

To the 14 &15 years old me, make the most out of these years because these years will mark a story that will change you and your life. In this years, you will experience the happiest and the saddest moments in your life. So, as early as possible, tell everyone important to you that you love them. Moreover, stop being lazy and focus more on getting good grades. In the future and everyday, don’t be stubborn and don’t be such a brat.

To the 16 years old me, you are now a college student. Do not be contented on just getting a passing grade of 2.75 or 3.0. Aim for the best, the uno, the one. Do not stop dreaming and believing in yourself. Then also, be more of an extrovert because you will be needing as you will one day be a leader.

To the 17 year old me, I am giving you a heads up for the dramas which will come into your life. Whether your so called “friends” are internet bullying you, whether you are in the middle of people with complicated situation, or whether you are afraid of losing your friends, do not ever bawl your eyes out because of crying at those nonsense things. It will get better. I promise you.

To the 18 year old me, one of your dreams will come true. You will now be going out of the country and will see Mickey Mouse live! Mark this as the happiest day of your life. Moreover, yes, it is getting better. You have now a bunch of people in your life who are very mean but so honest and true to you. In one way or another, each of you compliments each other.

And last but not the least, to the 19 year old me. I am so proud of you. You survived the past 18 years of your life being brave and not letting people look down on you. For the past years in your life, I can say that it has been meaningful not only to you but as well as to other people. 

I have given a part of my life and time in the activities in your church, which serves as my mission. My family is busy but we make it a point to spend more time with each other. Though as I may say, not all families are perfect, including ours. Still, I love them and I wouldn’t trade them for anyone else. I also had a tight bond with my batchmates, people whom I now consider my best friends/brother or sisters/family. I am glad I found them. They had been with me through joy and tough times. I told you, it does get better.

In the past, I felt like running away and throwing away everything I have right now because of the feeling that my parents and aunt have planned out my life for me. As it turns out, God had other plans and it is much better. I told you, it does get better.

At the age of nineteen, I graduated college and was the first one to land a job right before graduation. Though it is still because of my parents, I am very much grateful.

In my nineteen years of existence, I had all of the kinds of blessing pouring right at me and I couldn’t thank God more than enough.

Dear future me,

Be thankful everyday of the life you have right now. Be thankful that the past painful experiences have resulted to who you are right now. And yes, it does get better.

God has so much plan for you and in the future. All you can do right now is focus on your job and study more. After that, great things will come your way.

Happy Birthday! <3 <3 <3

(Source: heeran-moto)

12:29 am  •  29 April 2012  •  View comments

Counting down to something very important.. :)

(Source: heeran-moto)

12:32 am  •  1 March 2012  •  View comments

Last year, I started my internship at PCU’s Guidance office. I am set to have 300 hours in that office and the next plan is to have my internship in a Government institution.

But somehow, December got a bit messy for me. Four days before our Christmas vacation, my mom and my friend from our english center called me up ang persuaded me to be a tutor to korean kids. I thought, why not, it will be a win-win for us, they will have their teacher and I will earn a bit for two weeks. My only problem is that I will not be able to start my narrative report this Christmas vacation. But, I think I can pull it off so, I agreed and, they also persuaded me to just have my internship in their office for the HR Department.

Moreover, my brother already resigned as a call center agent to be a Tutor/HR/Guidance Counselor in our english center. So, the whole family is all in one company!

OH MAY GAAD! I never thought that teaching english to koreans will be that hard, tiring and nerve wrecking. Many of them, most of the time doesn’t want to study and just like to play. Though they are sometimes like that, they are so fun to be with, I loved talking with them, and this teaching experience is such a good experience for me.

On the first week of January, I am again scheduled to go back to my original internship, but for one more week because they couldn’t find a replacement for me. When my dad told me that, funny as it seems, I cried because I think that he doesn’t understand that I feel like it is getting harder and harder for me to finish my internship while having a job, that my focus on my duties as a guidance counselor intern is like blurring away, and that they don’t understand that making a case study is not that easy, and that I am not like him who can pull off 5 different jobs in one time. But I agreed anyway. It’s not like I can do something.

Furthermore, my mom offered me a job at the high school we are building..the job is something like an HR and when the school finally opens, I will be the guidance counselor until my Aunt retires at PCU and make me her replacement.

Told you it’s messy. :X

Then, tomorrow, I will be back in PCU to finish my remaining 110 hours, case study and a sponsored activity.

I am so excited to see my friends again..

(Source: heeran-moto)

9:52 pm  •  8 January 2012  •  View comments

Let’s see if I did it..

• take my medicine (for allergic rhinitis) everyday..include vitamin c too :) - I take medicine more often than last year..and, I don’t take vit. c..that’s why i’m sickly..so, i now know what to do for next years..
• never be lazy to wash my face at night. - uhm, well, i improved! less pimples :)
• grow my hair long and stop myself from going to salon to cut it. - ah, yeah i’ve grown my hair long..yay me! but I had it chopped off just recently..
• be more of a girl. i know, i need this. - I am now.
• always write lectures..it helps, i know. - uhm, I do jot down notes..
• keep my handouts. oh, my handouts are always lost when exam week comes..messy me.. -_-  - I survives first semester and, I had a binder to keep all my handouts.
• keep my bag clean, neat, crumpled paper free, candy and food wrappers free.. - yeah, sometimes..I am less messy now.
• EAT RIGHT. no more junk foods for breakfast, lunch or dinner. - a big FAIL!
• exercise. - BOO ME!
• stop procrastinating. - In my defense, the requirements are toooo many and hard! try interpreting SSCT, TAT, BGT, DAP & HTP..but, yeah, boo me!
• take things easily. - I am relaxed everytime I do things, except when I am cranky.
• lessen the temper. - I am more controlled now. just don’t do something stupid that would snap me out of my temper control.
• always have my to do list in order to prevent cramming. - I had my to do list. It helped quit a bit in organizing the things I need to do first..
• do the requirements ASAP. - FAIL!
• STUDY. Study. study. - I think I did. I survived my last semester having regular classes! :)
• save money. - SAVE and spend..boo me!
• be productive. - I am..I always am..haha!
• invest good Books. - I had two to three good books this year..
• STOP buying magazines. unless, brother dear or ina or ama buys it for me..haha.. - As far as I can remember, I bought like 3 to 4 times with my own money this year then the rest, mom or dad buys it or my brother buys it as a pasalubong for me..or, I make them buy me one. XD
• stop impulse buying.. - I don ‘t know! haha..
• control my usage of the computer. (gawd, tumblr! Y U do this to me?) - I did controlled my usage during exam week, thesis making and requirements making time..
• use my skills. - I took more photographs this year and started making a story which up to now is not updated..at least I started. :D
• discover my talents. - uh, refer to the answer above.
• learn how to draw. - I did learned something about doodling..and put it into a good use.
• take good pictures. :) - I DID!! :)
• be good to other people. - haha..I don’t think I can ever change..I think I became worse..
• lessen the bitchin’. - answer up there ^
• try to see the good in everyone. - I do this you know..
• to love everything that i do. - yes..I love writing, drawing, taking photographs and studying!
• to be A SENIOR student Next Year. - I am graduating now..and I am proud!
• no boys. no boys. boys.  - big YES!
• Make my parents proud. (father already wrote my future..) - In some ways, I know I did..
• gain more friends.. - did I?
• learn to say no. - I have more controlled personality now. :)
• to enhance my personality. - In some ways, I know I did! :)

Time to make a new one.. :) In few days, I will be bidding goodbye to 2011.. :)

12:03 am  •  12 December 2011  •  View comments

I posted this as a status on my facebook and a friend of mine asked, “What if you can’t stop it? :( ” and, yeah, it got me thinking. What if..

That statement and question works really well for me.

You know those profession classification when you take an interest test? For me, I have taken a lot of those, different kinds and many times but the result is always the same. Professional and Artistic.

Professional = Nursing/Psychology

Artistic = Photography

As for me, I took up psychology as a course because, I didn’t know what I want back then or I was pressured by my family or because we lack money or I can’t tell them what I wanted. Maybe just one of those reasons applies for me but, believe it or not, all of it could.

I am about to graduate and I know a part of me is happy, and a part of me isn’t. Years ago, I figured out what I wanted but still now, I am patiently waiting for time to come that I can pursue and tell everyone that, photography is what I really wanted.

For nearly for years now, there are times that I get so sad not doing something in lined with the profession that I really wanted but, everyday I tell myself, “what I have right now is something that I really like, something that I really love” to bring myself up. If I am not happy with this, I could have just thrown everything and stopped right there.

So, going back to my answer to my friend’s question, I told her, “Maybe you can tell that you’re not happy as of now. But, just like what you said, you can’t stop it. Then maybe, I think a part of you wants it”.

I want something otherwise, but I can’t stop studying psychology because I know that a part of me wants it.

(Source: anchorsandstripes)

7:16 pm  •  4 December 2011  •  View comments

Last tuesday, we had another sharing and discussion with one of our guidance counselors or our supervisor. He is teaching us that in order for us to finally move forward with our lives, we have to let go of our past by forgiving those who have wronged us, ask forgiveness to those people we committed mistakes to, and most especially to forgive ourselves for those mistakes.

I knew I needed this.

I am now a graduating college student and I need to be free from my old childish ways. i need to forgive especially the people whom I consider my friends.

But up until now, I am still reluctant..no, scratch that, I am scared to do. But I know I should do it.

So, I am gathering up all my courage and I know I can do it.

Pray for me. :)

God grant me the serenity 
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time; 
Enjoying one moment at a time; 
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; 
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it; 
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life 
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

—Reinhold Niebuhr

(Source: heeran-moto)

8:56 pm  •  30 November 2011  •  View comments

(Source: heeran-moto)

12:15 am  •  14 November 2011  •  View comments

I am happy. :)

(Source: heeran-moto)

12:15 am  •  27 October 2011  •  View comments

• Halo-halo yung istorya. Unang scene tapos, maya-maya iba na pala ang istorya.
• Alam niyo yung pakiramdam na alam mong nasa panaginip ka lang? madalas ganun ako eh..
• Uhm, minsan tinatry kong ituloy..wala, nakaktuwa lang eh. Pinipilit kong matulog.
• Yung panaginip diba unconscious mind natin, alam nio yung sinasabi mong ayaw mo makita, makasama o iniiwasan na tao..tikna! close kayo sa panaginip.
• Ang saya din naman kasi minsan nakaksama ko yung mga gusto kong makasama at namimiss kong tao.
• Minsan naiisip ko, sana hindi ko nalilimutan mga panaginip ko..

(Source: heeran-moto)

4:06 pm  •  26 October 2011  •  View comments